Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Yours Truly, Frustratedly Peeing

So it looks like the story of my life continues to be:
 "Frustration With Military Healthcare: Pensacola Edition".
 I got burned not once, but twice today.
 Went in to tell my Dr. that I am not only over a week late,
 but I've also been experiencing some symptoms of what I think is pregnancy
 or my body is just as stupid as I think it is.
 So I asked for a blood pregnancy test.
 I took a urine one last week here at home and it was a big fat NOT
 and I've heard the blood tests are way more accurate and sensitive
 and can pick up smaller amounts of hcg.

 Well, my doctor just politely smiled at me,
 and refused. 
 He said that he would only give me another urine test,
 which I know will be negative because my one at home was.
 I called my mom and she said her urine tests were showing negative up until a month and a half to two months in with both me and my brother.
 So I know this one will be a NOT as well.

 I'm just so frustrated. 
 So as I sit there on the verge of tears, he looks at me and says,
 "You're only 23. I don't understand why you care about getting pregnant anyway. It's not like your biological clock is ticking or anything."
 Are you serious jerk?? (insert other choice word here. I'm trying to keep this clean).
 So you're telling me that because I'm not staring menopause in the face,
 I should just lay back and not give a crap when I get to be a mother?
 What if I told you I want 3 kids, and the longer it takes to get each one makes the next that much less possible? 

My poor husband sees me about to reach out and deck him right in the eye start crying,
 and says,
 "See, AM just really wants this so bad; we both do. And it's hard for her because all of our friends had really easy times getting pregnant. Or weren't even trying at all. And as of right now she has at least one friend in every month of the pregnancy spectrum. So it's all she ever hears about from people and it gets difficult when it's all we think about."
 I love him.
 It's sexy when a man stands up for his woman.

 But the Dr. just sits there,
 and smiles at me.
 And literally twiddles his thumbs.

 And then he commits the cardinal sin.
 The big mac-daddy.
 The Super No-No.
 My MALE doctor looks me right in my teary eyes and says,

 I swear I sat there a solid minute
 unable to even believe he just said that
 before I finally responded with,
 "No. No, I'm pretty sure you don't."
 and walked out the door.

 So I went down the hall in tears,
 took my stupid urine test,
 and went home
 and cried to my dog.
 And of course got no call back about my results 
 that I was supposed to get in one hour.

 So now here I sit,
 angry and bitter and sad and a pathetic mess.
 I got the, "come back in 6 months if nothing's happened" order.
 I really don't want to be a constant cry-baby
 or a constant complainer.
 But seriously?
 I really don't know how to end this post.
 I'm just really kind of devastated. 
 I'm so sick of thinking about this.
 And I'm sick of holding other peoples' babies
 and feeling less and less every month like I'll ever hold my own.


  1. wow that is the most rediculous thing I've heard. What would it hurt them to just give you a blood test?! So dumb. I'm sorry :(

  2. Can you change doctors? He doesn't sound like someone I'd want to be dealing with!

    Hope you get some answers soon.

  3. I'd try to find a new PCM... maybe a woman. The guy sounds like a jerk for sure.

    I'm so sorry you had to deal with this. I'm surprised you can't just go to the testing place and ask for a blood draw. When I had it done it was not necessary for a doctor to put paperwork in for it, I just walked in, said I wanted a blood test for pregnancy and then had it done. Results back quick.

  4. I have serious issues with the military healthcare system. If you want, you can try going to patient advocacy (I would try to get a woman) and plead your case. Things have always gone swiftly and in our favor when we used them.

  5. Dr. can be insensitive. I've had some good ones and then a few bad ones thrown in. So will continue to pray for you and wait a bit longer to get tested if that's they way they are gonna be. Sometimes it takes a 8 weeks b4 tests show positive. I had a few times when I thought I was pregnant when we were married over a year and then nothing. Not fun waiting but will pray it will! Hugs!

  6. I would definitely be asking for a new doctor! What a jerk! I'm sorry that you're having to go through this.

    I've had similar experiences, not with pregnancy, but with my health. The doctors would not listen to me and just blew me off. It took them six years to realize I have a whole mess of issues!

    Keep fighting and good luck with everything!

  7. first, go to the Dollar Tree and buy a dollar pregnancy test (or heck, buy a whole slew of them), they are some of the most sensitive ones out there. second, find a new dr! what a lameass.

  8. Thank you so much everyone. I promise to stop whining about this all the time, I just couldn't believe his responses to me and my husband. You ladies are THE BEST!!

  9. I have never read your blog before, but I have been in a similar situation. If you are seeing a doc on base you can ask to see a different one. If they won't switch it you need to contact the Patient Advocate on base and they should help you! No doctor should talk to you that way and make you feel that way! It doesn't matter your age, if you want to have babies, then they need to listen to you! I know the ache of wanting to hold your own child and not everyone else's baby!

    As for right now, and getting some blood work done, you can go to a local planned parenthood and they will do it for about $30 I think. It's just so much easier to know than to be left waiting.

    I wish all the best and I hope you get you BFP soon!

  10. Okay I literally think that you and I are twins....seriously military and civilain drs are sooooooooooo inconsiderate and my dr even after the. "Supposed 1.5 yrs u have to be actively trying for tricare protocal" they don't give a shit about ur questions feelings or problems. My dr looked me in the eye and told me that I am so young (23 yrs old too btw) and I had literally millions and millions (she repeated the word millions for about what had seemed like 45 mins) of eggs. Is your husband deployed is usually the next question which pisses me off to no absolute end. Anyways just wanted you to know that reading your blogs makes me realize im not the only one......thank u.

  11. An uncaring doctor here was where I finally drew the line with military care.

    When I was in my freshman year of college I found out I was pregnant and had only been with my now husband one time. Sadly I lost that baby right before the second trimester but fast forward 2 years and I missed a few pills and now have a wonderful son.

    So never having tried to get pregnant before I waited the year before seeing a doctor. Went to one in Germany who ran some tests and he said something about possible endo but I already had a child so there shouldnt be an issue and wait so many months and come back. Tried to see a doctor in VA because waiting so many months found us in the midst of a move and I never got to see the doc in VA because we didnt stay there long.

    So after 18 months of trying now and we are finally 'settled' I see the doctor at this post we are now. He informs me that every girl has pain with their periods. My test have all came back normal and that since I already have a child then nothing can be wrong. He also said they did every test possible and that MAYBE after a few more months then my husband should be tested. The ONLY tests I had up to that point were ultrasounds and some bloodwork! I left his office that day in tears.

    The civilian doctor I saw here immediately knew something was wrong because of how much pain I am in every month. He did a laparscopy and found endo and scar tissue. We were hoping that I would get pregnant after surgery but it didnt work. I ended up leaving his office because he wanted to do remove my right tube via a c-section type procedure and I am now seeing a infertility specialist who can do it laparscopically and reduce my chances of having more scar tissue.

    If I listened to the damn military doctors I more than likely would never have a chance at another baby. I have a slim to none chance of getting pregnant because my endo, scar tissue and my right tube is blocked and full of fluid and I am missing my right ovary.


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